Torn between two countries

Palo Duro Canyon, Texas

Toyohira River, Sapporo

It's that time of year again.  The time where me and Nathan have to decide if we're going to stay another year in Japan, or leave next August.  I can't believe how quickly two years have gone by.  It's mind-boggling.  I guess after three years, you'd think the decision would be easy, but it's not.  I never dreamed I'd become as attached to this country as I have - the people of Japan, and to Sapporo, especially.  It's just been so easy to live here.  I have a job that I love, and Ethan is in a great (albeit expensive) school.  I've made memories and friends here that I know will last a lifetime.

But someday, we'll have to go back home.
The question is, when.

My parents and sister are in Texas, and well as other people I miss the heck out of.  I'm so relieved that my mother's chemo treatment is having a positive effect, but I should be closer to her.  Ethan's dog is in Texas. And I wanna have another baby someday.  There, I said it.

But what in the world am I gonna do when I get back to the States?  Job wise, that is.  I don't know if I have the patience anymore to teach theater.  Where will Ethan go to high school?  Will Nathan go back to acting?  All difficult questions that we can prolong answering just a little bit longer if we stay one more year.

どうしよう??